Creating Quiet Amidst The Falls

Screw Auger Falls by Matt June 2011

Jon Kabat-Zinn writes, "Our actions are all too frequently driven rather than undertaken in awareness, driven by those perfectly ordinary thoughts and impulses that run through the mind like a coursing river, if not a waterfall." This rings so true for me as I transition to a new life of separation and recovery.

As I engage in "mindfulness practice", I am constantly challenged when trying to create a quiet safe place free of busy thoughts. Negative self talk, worries over finances, reconnecting relationship connections, should dos and to dos all attack with a vengeance as I try and create a sense of calm. These ordinary thoughts awaken like rambunctious children seeking attention.

I'm cultivating the skills of being able to pull myself from the sweeping current, climb upon the banks and merely sit and observe. By being present and seeing, hearing and re-energizing from the passing experiences my recovery will be attained. This takes energy. Energy that I don't always have.

Depression is the great energy hog. For an entity that really does nothing useful, he sure uses a great deal of my energy reserves. This is why, regardless of my energy level, I have now committed twenty minutes in the morning and twenty minutes at night of mindfulness practice. The same practice I outlined earlier in the post, "Mindfulness".

Like my commitment to writing this blog, my commitment to practicing mindfulness will undoubtedly improve my state of mind and heart. As I continue my venture towards a steady habit of mindfulness meditation I will keep you all informed.

Take Care Of Yourselves!