I don't want to wait for the long drawn out cycle of adjusting medicines. I feel the mood lightening and I want to chase the depression away as quickly as possible. I don't like having to wait.
My impatience is increasing as my sleep has really continued to be exceptional and I can feel lightness creeping back into my daily life. The underlying irritability still plagues me, but it feels like it may be getting better. I don't know if it is or isn't but my daily mood and feelings seem to be lighter.
The Abilify is increased and now I need to wait for abit before moving down on my dosage of the Lexapro. It's like that old Tom Petty song, "The waiting is the hardest part."
Part of what is hard in the waiting game is that I feel pretty revved up. I wouldn't call it anxiousness, it's more like stored up energy spilling out. My legs want to move, I can't sit still, I want to pace and constantly be in motion. I have been this way for awhile and I think it is the Lexapro firing up a hypomanic state. My thoughts don't match this feeling to move, rather it is my body feeling like it is turbo charged. It is pretty amazing that I'm sleeping.
In a nutshell, I'm impatient. I want to feel better now. Not tomorrow or the next day, but rather here and now. I'm glad my sleep continues to be so great, but I want my waking hours to be as enjoyable too.
No comments:
Post a Comment