First Signs

My depression's onset slid over me so gradually it had a full tenacious grip before I even realized I was ill. The moment of realization for me was in late August of 2010. That summer I had broken my left heel and tore the plantar fascia. I was forced to convalesce for 16 weeks with my foot in a protective boot. That meant no hiking, mountain biking, beach activities, concerts and terrible isolation.

Late August is when I fully realized I was depressed. At first I felt it was purely situational and when the boot would be removed and my activities resumed, I would feel great again. That did not occur.

When I was able to remove the boot and was mobil again my mood did not improve. Instead I felt that a darkness had enveloped me that I could not think away. No matter how hard I tried, and I did work very hard, the heaviness would not subside. Waves of sadness plagued me each day. There was no rhyme or reason to the sadness or the mysterious blue waves that would envelope me.

I was in a fantastic relationship with the most beautiful person I have ever known, I was successful at my job, I had wonderful friends and a beautiful home. No matter how hard I focused on those things the sadness was ever relentless.

In September I made an appointment with my medical Doctor.